WHAT I SHOULD HAVE SAID is not what I did say come to think of it I didn’t actually say anything at all which usually feels like it is the right thing to say or even to not say but that I now see that it isn’t not always not ever almost but the almost is precisely where I live even if I only wish to live somewhere else than this almost but that’s all there is to me that’s all that means something to me you know the suspended state between decisions is the one thing I should have said but no words exist to say almost so I guess I’ll wait.

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